Mary

In an earlier post, I explained how I came to be sure of G-d's existence, but I left out a few points. After my brother's military experience, the biggest factor comes from my aunt with whom I share a name. My aunt and our name are important here. You'll see why.

My Aunt Mary is living proof of G-d. (Now you know my first name, but I'll be keeping my last to myself, at least for now.) When she was two years old, she was diagnosed with Cystic fibrosis (CF for short). This was about fifty years ago so this diagnosis was basically a death sentence. Even today, doctors inform parents of kids with CF that their life expectancy is 30 years old. So the doctors told my grandparents that she would die in the next ten years. When she made it to 10, the doctors said she wouldn't make it out of her teens. When she did, they said she wouldn't ever get married or have kids. Not only did she get married, she's seen both of her children get married, and has already welcomed one grandchild into this world. As if this terrible disease wasn't enough, she also has diabetes. CF requires one specific diet and diabetes requires another. She also has an insulin pump. Between these two diseases, she is in the hospital a lot. There's more...

My freshman year of college, Aunt Mary was diagnosed with colon cancer. She underwent surgery the day before my twentieth birthday. A large part of her colon was removed and she had to get an ileoscopy bag.  By the end of the summer, she had started chemo. When I saw her at Christmas, her hair was thinning and they had a bed set up for her downstairs so she didn't have to battle the stairs. The following spring, she had a second surgery to get rid of the ileoscopy bag and reconnect her colon. As of the writing of this post, she is in remission. She's not out of the woods yet, but she has survived thus far. And she's survived a hell of a lot. The statistics have this woman dead by now. She is alive by G-d's good grace. How can anyone who knows her history deny G-d's existence? Certainly, not I.

Besides acknowledging that her life is something miraculous, I am inspired by my aunt's own faith. When lots of bad things happen to people, they are quick to dismiss G-d, saying that if G-d existed then all those bad things wouldn't have happened. But for my aunt, all of these things she has battled against and happily so. Most people would understandably be disgusted by having to have an ileoscopy bag, but my aunt just said "Well if that's what I have to do to live, then I guess I have to do it." She prays to G-d and goes to church. She always brings her Bible with her into the hospital. She doesn't know why G-d's kept her alive, but she's glad He has. Even though our conceptions of G-d are different, it is still inspiring.

It is not uncommon to identify with the people with whom you share a name. I have known and experienced my aunt's story for my entire life. Of all my aunts and uncles, I was always most concerned with her and her life because I had her name. To some people, my name is just a generic Christian name. But my mother named me after her own mother and her sister. My mom considered some random baby-book names, but ultimately she chose a name with deeper meaning for her and a deeper meaning for me.

Other kids have always picked on me for my name - don't get me wrong, I know way worse things could have happened to me, but that doesn't mean getting teased didn't hurt. At my Christian preschool kids sang "Mary had a little lamb" at me all the time. There was also the rhyme "Mary, Mary Quite Contrary." When I was in CCD, everyone snickered any time the Virgin Mary was mentioned. That happened for all 8 years; no one ever matured. In high school I always got the totally respectful and not at all private question, "Mary, are you a virgin? Are you Virgin Mary?" At times in my life, I really hated getting teased and I resented the kids who did it. I wanted to change my name - I even went so far as to pick out a new one. I chose Sarah, but my parents wouldn't comply and call me by it. Eventually, I got over it, though, and became very proud of my name.

I wouldn't be who I am or where I am, if my name were anything else. I would never really change my name. I am quite honored to be named after my aunt who is a wonderful human being, is an inspiration, and is very proof of G-d's existence.